Monday, September 28, 2009

Balancing ambition and family

Great article in the Chronicle today about balancing ambition and family:
Superprofessor meets supermom.

Chávez-García articulates some of the thoughts that sometimes run through my head.  Do I want a third kid?  I've always said two would be great, but now that the little one is leaving babyhood behind (and heading into terrible toddler-hood tantrums) I look at newborns longingly.  I think the third one would send me over the cliff personally, but I do so love little babies.  I don't worry as much about it being career suicide (although maybe I should), but more just a logistical nightmare.

I also love the discussion in this article about why do we have children.  And why do we stop at whatever number we do choose?  Husband and I joke that is is so we'll have someone to put us in the nursing home one day.  But, is it also key to impart our values to future generations?  Which leads me to wonder, how well I'm doing in that category?  Am I imparting the values I want to share?  Please discuss...


  1. Don't ever worry about not imparting your values. If you're 1/10th as thoughtful in your parenting as you are in your blogs, your kids are set.

    On another note from the cited article: "I must admit that my initial attempt to be supermom came from reading too many parenting books and magazines as well as from engaging in several play dates with well-intentioned stay-at-home moms who seemed to record or scrapbook their children's every move."

    I plan to steer clear from over-preparing for child rearing the way that I over-prepare for all my academic and career ventures. This seems like one area where it would be easy to lose myself and stress out the deeper I get. If modern (wo)man has been doing this for hundreds of thousands of years without reading some expert's book, so can I! Plus I have my mom and several friends whose experience (and babysitting time) I can borrow.

  2. I definitely went overboard in the begining with the parenting books. I figured if I just read enough books, surely one would have the protocol for getting my little one to sleep on his own (not touching me). I love little ones, but touching one 24/7 does get a little old at some point. Oh and when you are nursing all the time, you have a lot of time to read. But, babies are not science, however they will eventually get old enough to sleep on their own.
    Definitely much more relaxed with number two.
    I do find myself parenting reactively sometimes(trying desperately not to become a helicopter parent) and working on teaching independence in an age specific way. Having a good daycare/preschool has been very helpful for this, as they encourage the kids to do things for themselves and generate a little positive peer pressure.